Is Anyone Alive Out There?

Tonight as I'm sitting here watching (well re-watching) Lost and doing stuff on the internets, I hear this crash on the side of the house. So, what do I do? Grab my flashlight and go investigate...at 12:30am...with no shoes on...with only a flashlight to protect me. Brilliant. It turned out to be something that I precariously stuck on a shelf in the garage that fell, but when I was coming back inside, I walked through spider webs. *shiver* And then it got me thinkin' that I guess the past few months/year or so has kind of been like that. I think one thing, go in the wrong direction, and then realize it was all caused by my laziness. No, I will not go into details, but suffice it to say, I haven't really felt much like writing, or really doing much of anything lately (well, it IS summer you know...), but tonight I felt like blogging again so now I will start blogging again. Cause that's how I roll.

Sometimes Things Don't Turn Out Like You'd Expect...

So today I decided to get out the Christmas stuff and decorate...

Instead:

I found out that my Christmas tree is crooked and I can't get it to stand up straight, so I gave up halfway through decorating and my living room is a disaster...and it will probably stay that way for a while.

I went looking for an extension cord and found all these things I had been missing...

Like:

My diploma for my master's degree.
An extra pillowcase to replace the one that was stolen a year ago.
A Christmas card from one of my students a few years ago that kind of made me tear up.
And yes, amazingly enough I did find an extension cord.

I pulled out my camera today and looked through the pictures to see what I had on there and found this video:

She's not normally like this, but when she's mad at me, she lets me know...and usually I make fun of her or yell right back. I think by the time I had pulled out the camera the hissing had stopped and she had calmed down enough to only growl.

And everything else I did today was boring...not that all that stuff previous wasn't boring, but well, you know.

So...

...if you know anyone in Montana or South Dakota, could you please tell them to click on my blog? Cause those are the only two white spots left on my google analytics map for the U.S. (and of course it's driving me nuts!)

Also, if you know anyone in Serbia, Ukraine, Lithuania, or Latvia, asking them to click on my bloggie would be cool too. Then I could have all of Europe.

Wow...it's like I'm playing Risk or something huh?

So...

...this is what writer's block feels like huh?

blah! :(

I'm Losing It....

I used to joke around with my old roomie Emily when she would say she was going to Wal-Mart and would ask me if I needed her to get me anything. I would say, "Yes, please get me a brain...i've lost mine."

So, Em...if you happen to go to Wal-Mart, could you see if they have any in stock? Seriously. This is me:

I think, "Oh, I need to send so and so an e-mail." So I walk the ten steps to my desk and sit down and then think, "Why did I come over here?"

or

The other day there were some kids in the library working on a project. I was sitting at the circ desk and apparently staring off into space when a kid asked me,
"Miss Johnson...is this what you do all day?"
"What? Stare off into space?"
"Yeah"
"No, I do actually work sometimes."

or

Yesterday I went to the post office. I sold another of my textbooks and needed to mail it. I usually print off the paper with all the details and stick it in the book so the buyer has a receipt of some sort. Well, I get the postage all done up and I'm talking to myself the entire time (never a good sign, but thank goodness I was alone). I was concentrating so hard on focusing on what I was doing that I stuck the receipt with the address in the book and put it in the envelope and sealed it up. Then I realized that I didn't write the address down. It was sealed inside a blank envelope. I had to call my BFF and ask her to look it up for me.

or

A million other situations just like those....

Oh! Okay, here's a funny story that has nothing to do with anything in the world. So I went to Target last night and was sitting in the car trying to write down a list so I could be focused inside Target. As I'm sitting there, this car pulls up and parks next to me. The guy gets out and goes around to each of his four doors and pulls on the handle like 5 times each to make sure each and every door is firmly closed and locked. And then he did my favorite OCD thing. He pulled on the last door handle several times in a row, paused for a second and then pulled on it again. And it reminded me of this teacher I used to work with that did the same thing. She would lock her classroom door, pull on the handle, unlock it, open it, close it, lock it again, pull on the handle, walk away, come back and double check the handle again.

Well, at least I'm not that crazy right?

This is gross...

I don't know why, but the thought of this really grosses me out....

Apparently...

...I collect things with bridges on them. Did you know that? I didn't either. My brother told me a few weeks ago that if you have more than four of something, that means you collect it and apparently I have more than four pictures of bridges. Then I started thinking of other things I am a collector of and here's what I came up with:

candy wrappers
half empty water bottles
books I have started to read but haven't finished
phone chargers to phones I don't have anymore
pictures in frames I have been meaning to put up somewhere but haven't found the spot
pictures I have been meaning to put in frames but haven't found the right frames
spare pillows
college textbooks that "I might use someday"
church bags
wristbands
dead bugs in the light fixtures (still haven't cleaned those out...)

And that's all I can think of for now...

*sigh*

I just haven't felt like blogging. Don't hate me okay? And don't leave my blog for good. One day I'll have something truly remarkable to blog about and then you'll be sad you missed it.

Wow, I really think highly of myself don't I? Geesh!

An Unfinished Post

About a year and a half ago when I first got on facebook, I thought "Hey, wouldn't it be neat if some of my friends from high school were on here? It sure would be neat to see what they are up to." So I did a search...and found nothing. "Oh well." I thought. "They probably all have lives full of husbands and wives and children and Saturday soccer games. They aren't going to waste their time on something like facebook. Not to mention, this is Red Oak we're talking about." And then I went on my merry way in ignorant bliss...

Then this summer I had a friend request from someone I went to high school with and was so excited when I found several others in our school/church/friend group as well. So I friend requested all of them and have been keeping tabs on them (a.k.a. stalking) ever since. Once again I thought it would be neat to see if anyone else from Red Oak High '94 was on facebook...and once again found nothing.

Then tonight I was doing my weekly random stalking and came across someone that I knew from high school but more than likely doesn't remember me. I didn't friend request her...why should I? We never were friends, just acquaintances. But going through her friend list I found so many other people from high school...people that I know of but never really knew and I'm sure who won't remember me. There was practically my entire high school class on facebook and I didn't even know. I looked at tons of people and only friend requested about 4 that I thought might actually remember me. And as I was looking at these people and thinking, "Wow. I never knew that about her/him!" I realized that not much has changed since high school. I'm on the outside looking in completely fascinated with their lives and doing more observing than interacting.

And then I realized that a lot of things HAVE changed in the past 15 years. I grew up for one thing...and so did they. Just looking at thier pictures I realized that they looked like grown-ups...not like the teenagers I remember them as. For another thing, I learned how to talk to people and interact with them. That may sound stupid, but I was extremely shy and very unsure of myself as a teenager. I don't think I ever held a conversation with anyone that lasted more than 5 minutes. Now sometimes you can't get me to shut-up (hence the blog).

Anyways, I don't really know the point I'm trying to make and I don't know that any of this means anything to any of you but since I've typed all of this I guess I'll go ahead and post it. Maybe later I'll think of an actual point to make and I'll amend this post. For now though, it's late and I'm going to bed.

Today at 3:15...

...I will be ready with purse in hand to walk right out of here. I cannot tell you how much I hate this week. Every year it is the worst...possibly even worse than the week before we get out for summer. Everyone is so incredibly ready to get out of school for the blessed 2 weeks and on top of that, everyone is so stressed out because not only do you have your own personal Christmas hell to go through, you have school Christmas hell to go through as well.

This specific week, however, has been crap-o-la. First we had the lovely day of Arctic Winter on Tuesday. The day which I couldn't get my garage door open (eventually I did though) and the same day that the power went out at school. Then it turned into Regular Texas Winter where it's just wet and cold and you hate being outside on Wednesday. The day that the heat didn't work in the library and there was a foul smell in the hallway, so I secluded myself in my freezer and tried to stay warm without puking from the stench. Then it turned into The Rainforest when the fog settled in. The day we had a PTA Pajama Read-In and Choir Concert here at school. It wasn't so bad...just extremely muggy throughout the whole school. This was also the day I discovered that a ginormous branch had fallen and was precariously leaning on a wire connected to my house. It almost knocked me over when I pulled it down.

However, today, the sun is shining and I get to see my gals for book club tonight. :) So let's hope it's the beginning of the end.

And remember folks...

"The best way to spread Christmas cheer is to sing loud for all to hear."

I Don't Know Why...

...anyone ever thought "Autumn Biscotti" would make a good candle scent. Yet another disgusting candle someone thought was good enough to put in the bathrooms at work....I threw it in the trash tonight.

...I ask the bilingual kids at school questions in spanish...because then they answer me in spanish and I have no idea what they are saying so then I have to have one of the other bilingual kids translate for me.

...I go to Home Depot and buy things...I always get weird looks when I am going out to my car with huge pieces of wood. Yes! I can make it fit and no, I don't need your help!

...I thought it was a good idea to go to Sonic and get those french toast sticks and then try to dip them in the syrup while I am driving...and shifting gears.

...I rush outside with a flashlight everytime I hear a noise in the yard. I mean, what good is that really going to do? Am I planning on beating some robber with my $5 flashlight or something? Will he be scared by my raging fit when we make eye contact? Ronnie the Rat wasn't scared, why would Robber Bob or Peter Possum or anything or anyone else that feels they have a right to my step foot on my property?

...JC Penny's keeps sending me ads and coupons. Did they not understand when I told them "I will never shop here again"?

...I even bother to rake up the leaves in my yard. I mean, I know I have lots and you can really tell a difference when I do rake, but nobody else in my neighborhood rakes their leaves. Some of them don't even mow their lawn except maybe once or twice a year.

...My cat is so dumb. After I yell at her for scratching the rug, she then proceeds to sit there and lick the spot she had been scratching.

Don't You Just Love It When You Discover Something New?

So this evening after a *cough* run *cough* with Amy, we went back to her apartment and started watching funny videos on You Tube and those dorky pictures of the cats with captions misspelled and in baby talk at icanhazcheezburger.com or whatever that site is with Matt. And then we watched the Harry Potter Puppet Pals videos. And then we watched the video where the engineers explain cats. And then Matt brought up this project he had worked on for days that was extremely boring he said. Some guy brought in all this footage and wanted it converted so he could post it on You Tube. So we found it...and it turns out that it wasn't boring after all. You just have to watch it with people that you can laugh with. So grab a friend or pretend that I'm sitting next to you. Hee-hee. Here is a sample.



Not only is there this video, but about 50 more...all with the same guy...and his bad tupe. He always is standing in front of the same shelves. And each time he sings a song...with the same melody...just different words. Okay, here is another one. It's called Candy Life or The Purple Candy Store.




You're hooked huh? Isn't it terrible greatness? So my wonderful and faithful readers, I just want to wish you all a Happy Candy Rebirthday.

It Is What It Is...

So for the past week I haven't written anything not because I haven't had anything to write about, (because there has been plenty...Manny the Squirrel, Macaroni and Cheese from 2001, a backpack eating kindergartener, Shia Le BUFF, etc.) but I just haven't felt like writing it. I read two very short verse novels this weekend, and that's all I can think in...verse. That happens to me a lot. When I read something that has lots of voice, I tend to write like that. So here goes a page out of the Book of Rhia in verse:

Sometimes
I wish I could sleep
all
day
long.

Then maybe
I could manage
to convince myself
that getting up
in the morning
is a good thing.

Pathetic...

I know.

The Dumbest Saying Ever

You can't have your cake and eat it too.

If you have the cake, it is yours and you should be able to do with it what you want, such as eat it. If you don't want to eat the cake, why do you have it? Give it to me and I'll eat it...assuming it's a cake that I like.

If you don't have the cake, how can you eat it? It's not there. You'll have to eat something else. If someone else has the cake, they may or may not choose to share it with you. If they do, then that part of the cake is yours and you can eat it. That's why they gave it to you. If not, then once again you'll have to eat something else...or jealously stand by and watch them eat the cake. I suppose that is an option too.

I guess the moral is that if you have cake, you better eat it before someone else comes along and finishes it off for you.

A Blog Revised

Okay, so my friend has a blog (Dr. Findley...see the link to the right) and whenever he posts, I don't understand any of it because it's all computer mumbo jumbo stuff and so I never know what to comment about. When I read it, it's like someone typed a bunch of random words and expects me to know what they mean. So here, I would like to break down his latest post and insert a few things so that it will make sense to the rest of the non-programmer world. All programmers beware, this may be blasphemy to you.

Here is the original post:

Leopards + Search Paths = paths.d

I’ve been messing around with MySQL, git, macports and a couple other things that place files where they weren’t part of my search path (aka the PATH variable). I’ve been adding stuff to /etc/profile or to my own .bash_profile to get around this problem, but it never quite felt right. With Leopard (Mac OS X 10.5), all you have to do is add a file in the /etc/paths.d directory with each path you want on a separate line. Ah, now that feels better.
Here’s an example:$ pwd/etc/paths.d$ cat git/usr/local/git/bin
This is all due to the path_helper program in your /etc/profile.

Here is it is revised a la Rhia:

Leopards + Pants = Disaster

I've been messing around with fashion and a couple other things that place leopard prints where they weren't supposed to be (aka Pants). I've been adding bling to make them more bearable to get around this problem, but it never quite felt right. With Leopard, all you have to do is pass it up with each pair of pants you want. Ah, now that feels better.
Here's an example: $100 pair of leopard print pants = 2 pairs of $50 jeans
This is all due to the pants helper program.

See? It totally makes more sense!

Facebook...let's just be honest with each other

Okay Facebook. We need to have a little chat. What is up with the advertisements you are allowing on your sidebar? I am deeply concerned. Apparently there are a lot of issues and offers out there that I haven't been aware of. Here is a sampling:

"Need Help Wasting Time?"

Ooooh! Ooooh! I can answer that one! No. I do not need help wasting time...that is why I am on facebook.

"Get A Guy"

*ahem* Thank you. Thank you for this advertisement. I was really wondering how I would accomplish the monumental task of how to get a guy and then you went and offered me a guide. I like to see that you have my best interest at heart.

"Fixes Snoring"

...it just looks like an el-cheapo mouth gaurd to me. Although I'm not sure...is it a nose plug? No, looks like a mouth guard. Either way, I don't see how either one would fix snoring.

"Help Share Christ's Love"

I'm not sure where exactly this picture was taken or what exactly it is, but I do know this...it has nothing to do with Christ. It appears to be someone's vacation/stupid tourist photo. It looks like two babies that are bowing...????

"Roosters Country Bar"

...Do they look like roosters to you? I mean, I get the double meaning behind Hooters, but Roosters? I guess it's the whole double-o/big boobs thing...

"No Poisoning Prairie Dogs"

Apparently this is a huge problem with facebook users. I know it is tempting but I encourage you to refrain. Just don't do it people. We have to save the prairie dogs. What would we do without them? I shudder to think...

Apparently...

...I was mistaken.

Case #1

So tonight whilst helping my brother with dinner, I was in charge of a huge pot of Rice-A-Roni. When cooking this delicious side dish, there are three basic directions to follow:

1. Pour the rice mix in the pan with some butter and let it get brown (ish).

2. Add water and the seasoning packet.

3. Let it boil and then simmer.

Now normally, people might make one or two boxes at a time, but when my brother's family, my mom, and I get together for dinner, there are nine of us so we made 4 boxes at the same time and instead of using a skillet, I used a big pot. I got to step two and instead of just asking for a big measuring cup, I decided I would use a small one and just take the pot to the sink. So I picked up the pot by the handles on the side...with no pot holder.

I was very proud of myself for not using any sentence enhancers that I would be embarassed about later.

Case #2

A few weeks ago I went to Ikea and found a bed that I really really liked. The only problem was that it wouldn't fit in Aibi's car. So I bought the parts that would fit in her car (the midbeam and the roll of slats). Yesterday I went back to Ikea and got the actual bed frame. I was so proud of myself as I was putting it together last night at 9:30pm...until I realized that I bought a queen sized bed and full/double sized slats. Yep. I'm sleeping on the couch again tonight.

Case #3

I thought that if I moved into a house I would be rid of weirdo neighbors. Wrong. I was outside a few weeks back and saw the neighbor boy go out onto the backporch in a pair of shorts with a towel slung over his shoulder while he rigged up sheets like a fort and then stood there behind his fort with the water hose running on his head. It took me a minute to realize he wasn't just cooling off...he was taking a shower.

Tuesday

On Tuesday I will have internet again and be connected to the wide world again.

On Tuesday the plumber will come fix the drain to my washer and I can have clean clothes.

On Tuesday I will post a new blog with all of my fun thoughts and things I have experienced in the past week or so.

On Tuesday I will read and laugh and comment on all of your blogs I haven't read yet.

On Tuesday I will finish unpacking.

But today I am borrowing my brother's internet.

Today I am going to finish my book (yeah, Breaking Dawn).

Today I am going to eat pizza.

And tomorrow I am going to mow my lawn...please pray for me.

i (Heart) Tunes

So I'm sitting here getting all caught up on blog reading and listening to my iTunes and I just thought it was funny how it goes from Metro Station (kind of upbeat beebop music...you can mock me...i like it) then it goes to Micheal Buble (who I like to call My-kul Bubble...who sounds a lot like Frank Sinatra) to the soundtrack of the TV show Lost. Just a random thought. Just thought I would share that.

Otherwise, I would like to spend a few minutes on Why Kids Pout. I would like to share with you two experiences I observed this week of kids pouting (only two you say? I know, I'm lucky...I don't have kids yet). First was this little girl that came to the bookstore with her family. She wanted everything but nothing was what she wanted and she would not be consoled. When they came up to pay, her mother informed us that she was pregnant and they had had the ultrasound earlier that day. The little girl was upset because she was getting a little brother and she wanted a little brother AND a little sister.
Second was tonight. I was at Blockbuster looking for a movie or 3 and this kid walks by me with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face saying, "They let someone else have all the Jaws movies."

That's about all the excitement I've had this week.

I Got Nuthin'

I'm just blogging to say that I really have nothing insightful or thought provoking to share with you. I am at the grunt part of my job...the end of the year when I get to clean and organize and put things away and try to remember everything I need to do because if I even had the time to make a list, it would get lost the minute I finished it. So, while my fellow bloggers are posting about crazy superheroes, the wonders of soda, the complexities of social circles, animal rights, the wonders of marriage and children, and analyzing Pride & Prejudice, I got nuthin'. All day long, people bring me stuff and either I put it away or put it in a pile so that it can be put away later. I do have some student helpers that are helping me un-bury myself. Mrs. N. has even come by twice and promised to help me but guess what? Yeah, she hasn't really come through with that yet. Maybe it's payback for calling her out in front of her daughter. Tomorrow my exciting project is to clean out two drawers of cords. I have no idea what any of them go to, but I'm going to do my best to figure it out because seriously...two drawers of cords? Come on!