Twilight: To Love or Not To Love

If you saw Twilight and liked it, great. I am very happy for you that it brought some amount of joy to your heart no matter how great or small that joy might have been.

I however, did not like the movie. I thought it was pretty much terrible. Here are a few reasons why (in no particular order):

1) There was no meadow scene. Edward was jumping around in trees and Bella was following him around by expertly manuevering over moss covered fallen trees. Bella is supposed to be a huge klutz...yes, that is very important to the story line.

2) Bella. She was a spaz 90% of the time. I couldn't even tell what she was thinking with all of the blinking and shaking and pained looks.

3) Edward. He looked like he was about to vomit 90% of the time. When he smiled, I actually believed he was Edward...but that didn't happen too often.

4) All the other vampires looked fake. And Jasper...oh Jasper was pure awfulness. He gets his own number...

5) Jasper. I think I've already posted my feelings about how incredibly gay he looks in the movie. And what was up with the bug eyes?

6) The Biology scene...need I say more?

7) Bella and Edward's conversations were...well...awkward. It felt a lot of the time like I was listening in on a private conversation and it kind of made me uncomfortable.

8) Billy and Edward's stare of death as they drove past each other.

9) 90% of the lines were out of context. For example: Bella pulls up to school. Mike runs up to her and says to her in a rush, "Hey Bella. I don't like you dating Edward. He looks at you like you're something to eat. Bye." and then runs off.

10) The overall directing, acting, and script...it was like someone let a 13 year old take over all three.

Now, here's the part that I don't understand. Friends that I have talked to that saw it and liked it agreed with the things I listed above. But then they still said they liked it in spite of that.

So I'm done. I'm done trying to convince the world of how terrible the movie was. It's like trying to fight a losing battle. No matter what points of argument I give, you will agree with me but then still pick the other side. It's too frustrating...I can't do it anymore. So if you liked it, good but I can't discuss it anymore. We'll have to find other things to talk about like the greatness of Little Debbie's Snacks or funny episodes of The Office or what you are going to get me for my birthday present or what Millie's different meows mean. Those are some good starting points for conversations right? Yeah, I think so.

Don't You Just Love It When You Discover Something New?

So this evening after a *cough* run *cough* with Amy, we went back to her apartment and started watching funny videos on You Tube and those dorky pictures of the cats with captions misspelled and in baby talk at icanhazcheezburger.com or whatever that site is with Matt. And then we watched the Harry Potter Puppet Pals videos. And then we watched the video where the engineers explain cats. And then Matt brought up this project he had worked on for days that was extremely boring he said. Some guy brought in all this footage and wanted it converted so he could post it on You Tube. So we found it...and it turns out that it wasn't boring after all. You just have to watch it with people that you can laugh with. So grab a friend or pretend that I'm sitting next to you. Hee-hee. Here is a sample.



Not only is there this video, but about 50 more...all with the same guy...and his bad tupe. He always is standing in front of the same shelves. And each time he sings a song...with the same melody...just different words. Okay, here is another one. It's called Candy Life or The Purple Candy Store.




You're hooked huh? Isn't it terrible greatness? So my wonderful and faithful readers, I just want to wish you all a Happy Candy Rebirthday.

Okay, I Really Think I Might Die This Time!

I just have four things to say:

1. J.J. Abrams

2. Good Night Nurse look at how friggin' hot Chris Pine is!

3. May 8, 2009

4. I'm sorry Sylar that J.J. made your eyebrows like that but don't worry, I still love you!

I Think I Have SARS...or something

Here are my symptoms:

I can't get up in the morning so now I have begun to set my regular alarm and my phone alarm. Now instead of hitting snooze every 9 minutes for an hour, I hit snooze every 4-5 minutes for an hour.

This morning after hitting snooze on my phone, I fell asleep with the phone open in my hand.

I stay up late...way too late knowing full well that it will be hard for me to get up in the morning.

I keep coming up with responsibilities that I feel the need to take on yet I don't have the time for them nor are they part of my job description.

My hair looks like crap-0-la.

Even when I do wear make-up, it doesn't matter because I feel so dead tired that I look like a zombie anyways.

I have no reason to complain yet I complain all the time.

I have recently become obsessed with Almond Joys and Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.

See? It's SARS. I think I'm going to die.

Apparently...

...there are some nerds out there that think that I am in love with them because I wear this shirt:

Please let me clarify: I am not IN LOVE with you because you are a nerd...I just love your nerdiness.

This is one of my favorite shirts. I like to wear it...a lot. I shouldn't because inevitably I end up having some awkward conversation with someone who says to me, "I'm a nerd." and then stares at me to see my reaction. I should have a response down by now, but I always end up smiling, giving an uncomfortable laugh, and then try to find something else to occupy my attention.

So, Saturday night I was working at the bookstore and consequently wearing my nerd shirt. We close at 8:00pm and right at 7:59pm, in walks two guys. In all fairness, they knew exactly what they were there to get and they didn't keep us there forever while they shopped, thank goodness.

We'll just call these guys Nerdy Nerd and Friend of Nerd. Nerdy Nerd pays for his merchandise first, and then Friend of Nerd puts his stack of books on the counter to pay for his. While I am ringing up Friend of Nerd, Nerdy Nerd says to me, "I'm a nerd." I smile, laugh uncomfortably, and occupy myself with trying to get them out as fast as possible so I can go home. This however did not deter Nerdy Nerd at all. He then takes out his cell phone and says, "I can prove it. Listen." and then proceeds to make me listen to some polyphonic beeping. So I just smile and nod my head in agreement that yes, you have now proved your nerdiness to me. Nerdy Nerd realizes that I have no idea what song he has just played for me, so he tells me. "It's from Super Mario Brothers."

Apparently, this isn't enough to convince me that he is really a nerd so then he says, "Wait, I have another one!" and then plays the Star Wars theme music.

"Wow! That is really nerdy." I say.

Please, please, please go away. Please.

"Here's another one." Seriously? I know you are a nerd. Just stop. Why is your friend standing there letting you make an idiot of yourself?

And then he begins to play the Darth Vader/Storm Trooper music from Star Wars. "That officially does it. You are a real nerd." I tell him.

So, Mr. Nerdy Nerd, I am not in love with you but I do love your nerdy ways and I do appreciate that you felt the need to prove it to me.

Oh How I Love Stupid People!

Before I begin this post, let me just preface it with "Don't freak out...I'm okay." and "Yes, life sucks, but I'm okay."

Yesterday I got home to find out my house had been broken into. Yay! They (we'll call them Robber Bob and Robber Rob...I'm just assuming there were two and that they were men...I know nothing about them), okay so they pried open my back door and tore up the door frame and part of the wall because the door had been dead bolted. They took my DVD player, all my DVDs (minus a few that were placed in other locations), my digital camera, and some cash. They went through my closet and my drawers looking for I don't know what. Jewelry? Money? Electronics? Really. Did they not know what neighborhood they were in? If I had enough jewelry or money to hide in my underwear drawer, why would I be living HERE? And really, do people keep expensive things in their underwear drawer in real life? I mean, I know they do that kind of stuff in the movies, but usually it's the rich rich people who do that in the movies, not people who live in the ghetto. Stupid. But, I love their stupidity. I love the fact that that's all they took. What do I care about a bunch of DVDs I never watch anymore? I love that they didn't smash or destroy anything. I love that they left everything they looked through open (including the air conditioning closet) so that the police knew what to dust for fingerprints. I love that they left a huge handprint on the backdoor. I love that they took what was on top and didn't dig deeper and find any of my credit cards. And Millie was in love with them because she had the entire day to go in and out as she pleased because they left the door open for her.

Anyways, I didn't write this so that you could feel sorry for me or have pity on me. Honestly, I thought this would be the easiest way to let people know that there will be no more movie nights at my house (like there ever was before) and not have to repeat my story 1,000 times.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go finish the laundry I started last night because I have to wash everything Robber Bob and Robber Rob touched with their grimy hands.

I Love/I Hate

I love counting change. Weird, I know, but I love it. It's soothing to me...kind of like alphabetizing things or listening to a clock tick.

However, I hate how dirty money is. Especially pennies. All the other change is shiny or whatever but pennies are always so incredibly nasty. Why is that? Why are pennies so gross? My fingers are black after counting them. *shiver*

I hate taking tests. Especially state certification tests in the state of TX. They suck. On Saturday, I had to take my librarian certification test and it was so unorganized and the administrators didn't know what was going on, it drove me nuts. Oh, and I just plain hate taking tests.

However, I always love to watch know-it-alls say something obviously stupid. It makes me smile. Which is what happened at my test Saturday. We'll call Miss Know-It-All KIA for short. Here is my story:
I get to the test site (Bryan Adams HS in Dallas...not a place I want to be after dark), and we are seated in the auditorium so that the administrators can make announcements on where everyone is supposed to be. While we are sitting there a LIC (Lady in charge) comes in and tells us that if we have a cell phone to go put it in our car because no cell phones are admitted. If we don't have a car (like if we got dropped off), then when we get in to our room to hand over our phone to the test administrator. If we are caught with a phone during the test, then our test is taken up and we must leave without finishing. So we get to our room and KIA asks the administrator if he wants to take our phones and he says "No, just keep it in your purse." Then a mini discussion ensues as KIA tells Mr. A (Administrator) the rules and he basically tells her it doesn't matter. KIA is frustrated because, well, she knows it all and is super nerdy taking some super nerdy math test and is one of those people who MUST follow the rules. Then after Mr. A is giving out the tests, KIA asks if he wants to see her calculator. He gives her a puzzled look and then she states loudly, "You're supposed to look at my calculator and make sure the memory has been wiped." Then she addresses the entire room and says, "It was in the rules. I read the rules and that's what it said." Really? You read the rules? Because if I remember correctly, on the first page in bold letters it states that cell phones are not permitted at the test site.

So just remember that with everything that you hate, there is always something in there you can find to love, and with everything you love, you may find something you don't like but you can still love it despite that.