A Blog Revised

Okay, so my friend has a blog (Dr. Findley...see the link to the right) and whenever he posts, I don't understand any of it because it's all computer mumbo jumbo stuff and so I never know what to comment about. When I read it, it's like someone typed a bunch of random words and expects me to know what they mean. So here, I would like to break down his latest post and insert a few things so that it will make sense to the rest of the non-programmer world. All programmers beware, this may be blasphemy to you.

Here is the original post:

Leopards + Search Paths = paths.d

I’ve been messing around with MySQL, git, macports and a couple other things that place files where they weren’t part of my search path (aka the PATH variable). I’ve been adding stuff to /etc/profile or to my own .bash_profile to get around this problem, but it never quite felt right. With Leopard (Mac OS X 10.5), all you have to do is add a file in the /etc/paths.d directory with each path you want on a separate line. Ah, now that feels better.
Here’s an example:$ pwd/etc/paths.d$ cat git/usr/local/git/bin
This is all due to the path_helper program in your /etc/profile.

Here is it is revised a la Rhia:

Leopards + Pants = Disaster

I've been messing around with fashion and a couple other things that place leopard prints where they weren't supposed to be (aka Pants). I've been adding bling to make them more bearable to get around this problem, but it never quite felt right. With Leopard, all you have to do is pass it up with each pair of pants you want. Ah, now that feels better.
Here's an example: $100 pair of leopard print pants = 2 pairs of $50 jeans
This is all due to the pants helper program.

See? It totally makes more sense!

On Your Mark, Get Set...Ha-Ha-Ha!

A few weeks ago, Amy, my brother Krish, my future SIL Becky, and I traveled to Austin to participate in Nike's Human Race. It was a 10K (about 6 miles) race and had tens of thousands of people there. It was really a lot of fun. Even though I ran a marathon last January, it was nothing like this. There were big time sponsors giving out free stuff (Lance Armstrong Foundation, Ozarka, Power Bar, etc.), and all sorts of people coming out to run in the biggest race in history (or some such nonsense...they kept telling us we were making history but I couldn't figure that part out), and even the Incredible Lance Armstrong himself came out to run. We didn't see him...or run with him. We were too slow. Apparently you only got a glimpse of the Invincible Lance if you were in the same athletic ability grouping as he is. So, without further adeu, here is our fun exeperience in quotes and pictures and a few words of my own:

First, we got there early...like 6 hours early. We thought there would be SOMETHING to do once we got to Austin but there wasn't because everything was shut down since they blocked off the roads so the race people could get everything set up. So we walked around...a lot...and saw some fun stuff.

Exhibit A:

As we were walking around, they had music blaring, music that makes you pumped up, like Survivor's Eye of the Tiger or J.T.'s Bringin' Sexy Back...which was what this guy was dancing to. He is probably in his 50's and just having a good old time dancing on down the empty street.

Exhibit B:

I had decided that when I saw people that were picture/blog worthy, I would have Amy pose like I was taking a picture of her, but the real focus would be the picture/blog worthy person. It didn't work to well here, but the lady with the sunglasses had her shirt pulled up to her boobs and her gut was hanging over her spandex shorts. By the time I took the picture, she had pulled her shirt down. Oh well.

Exhibit C:

This was pure greatness. The intent was to take a picture of the ladies from Ozarka handing out free shirts but instead I got this random guy's backside while standing on a ladder. The Ozarka Girls (Blondie and Brunnie) were R-U-D-E rude. When we went up to get some water and a free t-shirt, our presence wasn't even acknowledged. I looked at Blondie and said, "Hi." and she said "Hi." and about 5 seconds of awkward silenced passed before I asked, "Umm...can I get a shirt?" Seriously! Who wants to ask for a free shirt? If you're giving out free shirts, give them. Don't stand there and wait for people to ask. Anyways, so after I asked for a shirt, she replies, "Do you recycle?" in a clipped/snobby attitude. "Uh...yes." "Okay, what size?" Wow... Amy is behind me in line and when she steps up, Brunnie just looks at her and then turns around and walks off. So, Ozarka, while I appreciate your efforts to save the earth, you need to give your Promotional Activities Department a lesson in manners. And it's also kind of hypocritical to stand there and demand that I recycle while behind me is a delivery truck where they are unloading cases of bottled water while the truck is emitting ozone depleting fumes. I'm just sayin'.

Exhibit D:

I swear this guy was following us around. Not that I'm complaining or anything (he had really nice legs) but we must have crossed paths about 10 times. We first spotted him around 2:00-ish and this picture was taken around 5:00-ish. That's kind of a lot for 3 hours of randomly walking around downtown. I was afraid I wouldn't get a picture of him but thankfully he stopped to pose with a cup of water for us. Sweet!

Here are a few more pics just because:

This is the start/finish line. The race was one big loop.

Amy, myself, and Becky

Krish and Becky

Sadly, we put the camera up before the race. There was all manner of colorful socks, mowhawks, tucked in shirts to elastic waist shorts, kilts (yes kilts), and purple stirrup pants. Just use your imagination.

Nike was ingenious because instead of handing out numbers for you to pin on your shirt, they just printed your number on a shirt and that's what you wore. You can see from the previous pics that the shirts were red, so imagine being in the middle of thousands (I don't remember how many people were there but it was somewhere in the ten thousands) of people all wearing the same shirt. I felt really insignificant when I saw the sea of endless red shirts in front of me while running. I felt really good when I saw the sea of endless shirts behind me while running. And yes Samuel, Stalin would be so proud.

It took us about an hour and 45 minutes to finish, and I came in 10,152nd place...Lance finished in 34 minutes and came in 6th place. *sigh* If only I'd been faster.

And now for a few quotes...most of these were things people were shouting to us as "encouragement" as we were running...it was more like entertainment.

"This isn't a death march people! Get excited!" (because we were all walking and not smiling...and dying from the heat)

"You're earnin' yourself some Mexican food tonight!"

"I love those sexy socks!" (said to a girl wearing knee socks)

"Lllmmm...so awesome!"-drunk guy.... "I think that guy's drunk."-Amy.... "Really? Really!"-me

"Are ya'll here to run the race?" (as we walk by with our race shirts on)

"Just one more giant u-turn! You're on the home stretch." (as we discover we have 2 miles left)

Amy picks up her running shorts and smells them. "Ugh!".... "Well," I say, "what did you expect?"

I can't wait for the Turkey Trot in November!!!

My Guys

Do you know how happy this picture makes me?

*sigh*

Thoughts On A Sunday Evening

"A real man makes his own luck."
-Billy Zane, Titanic

I heart this quote for two reasons.

1) Dwight quoted it on The Office and it always cracks me up when two of my favorites reference each other.

2) It's true...in some ways. It basically means, if you want something-do something.

See, lately I have been kind of a brat. I've been pouting and bemoaning my marital/relationship status quite a bit...not outwardly for the most part but those closest to me have surely seen signs of it or have even been lucky to hear the tale first hand. Sadly though the brunt of my frustration has been taken out on the members of my new ward. It's hard for me to switch wards and get to know new people all over again. It's just not something I am used to...and with getting to know new people comes all of the questions, "Is your husband with you?" "Do you have anyone sitting with you?" "Do you have any children?" "Are you...single?" After about a month of this (because that's about how long it takes to meet and greet enough people so that word gets out and you don't have to answer those questions any longer...at least I hope so), it gets really annoying and I want to give snappy answers like, "Well what does it look like?"...even though I don't.

Last Sunday I found myself highly annoyed when a nice lady was trying to introduce herself to me (without the awkward questions about my non-existent husband) and was sending out all sorts of signals that said, "Leave me the #@%$# alone!" I had my legs and arms crossed, I never made eye contact, I gave clipped one word answers, and I didn't smile. Then after church I made a bee-line for the door and sped out of the parking lot. On my way home I was grumbling to myself about how I didn't like my ward because I didn't have any friends and I didn't know anyone and all I ever did anymore was watch the clock. Then my sane brain stepped in and said, "Why do you think that is?" and gave me a flash of what I must look like to others at church with my blank annoyed stares and speed walking to the door.

Oh...well...uh...yeah.

So this Sunday I decided to do something about it. I sat in the same spot as last time and when the nice lady sat down next to me again (because we all know we have our "spots" on certain pews) and called me Khia (kee-uh) because they misspelled my name in the ward newsletter, I smiled and laughed a little bit and started off the conversation the same way I do to everyone who reads my name before they hear my name, "It's Rye-Uh..." And then it turned out to be a very nice Sunday (and I only caught myself watching the clock once.)

Oops You Did It Again!

Yes people. The creator of two of my most favoritist TV shows has done it again. J.J. Abrams has created another obsession for my life.

First there was Alias which I'll admit, I only started watching because Michael Vartan is bee-u-ti-ful, but it also had a good storyline to go with it. A very good storyline until it went south during season 4 (the season I like to pretend doesn't even exist).

Second there was Lost. I was driving home one evening and saw the billboard ad for it and made a mental note of the date it was premiering so I could put it on my calendar when I got home. All I had to do was see that billboard and I was hooked.
And now there is a new show, Fringe...which has a storyline that is kind of hard to explain. Basically an FBI agent teams up with a genius and his crazy mad scientist father to investigate weird occurences that are all linked to fringe science. See? Kind of hard to explain. If you watch the pilot, eat first then watch. I'm just sayin'.

And now I will attempt to break down J.J. and his wonderful creation/co-creation habits for you.

J.J. has a habit of trying to create adult dramas (or dramas of the heart) that inevitably bomb (Six Degrees, What About Brian...Felicity did well so I have to give him credit for that one), when his real talent is in suspense dramas (see above).

J.J. has a habit of carrying actors over from previous shows. For instance, the guy who played Weiss on Alias was Sean from Felicity (he had a small part on Lost, I'm just waiting for him to pop up in Fringe...he and J.J. must be BFFs). The guy who plays Locke on Lost was Kendall from Alias. This time its the guy who plays the head of the secret agency on Fringe was the guy who works for Widmore on Lost. The black guy with immaculate diction.

Sadly, J.J. has a habit of starting a new show and ignoring the previous one until it gets extremely stupid and we have to pretend like seasons never existed. Case in point: Lost began when season 4 of Alias began. What does this mean for my precious Lost? It's about to get stupid. :( I really hope I'm wrong on this one.

He's getting in the habit of re-introducing teen stars as grown ups. I mean, who ever thought we'd see Matthew Fox again after Party of Five went off the air? This time Joshua Jackson has been resurrected from Dawsons Creek. Thanks J.J.!

The stars of his TV shows eventually go on to bigger and better and we get to see them in different roles (which I always like) after J.J. starts working on a new project and the previous one goes down the crapper. Jennifer Garner, Matthew Fox, I bet it will be the girl from Fringe...maybe Joshie...it's a toss up.

And finally, my favorite. He always keeps you guessing. This is why it becomes an obsession for me because it drives me nuts not to know.

So here's to my new obsession Fringe. Please feel free to join me. Really. Please do. I'll need someone to theorize with....please?....anyone?

Oh How I Love My Yard!

Thanks to my BFF Janette who had her baby shower today, I had a good reason to take the day off and not go in to work at the bookstore like I normally do on Saturdays. Thanks again to my BFF for not dragging it out to an all day occasion and thus I was home by 2:00 and had the rest of the day to myself. So what did I do? My new favorite thing...yard work. For those of you with yards, you may think I am joking but I'm not. I really love being in my yard. So I spent 5 hours today pulling weeds and baby pecan trees and trimming hedges and raking leaves and mowing and all that good stuff. Needless to say, my arms are killing me...killing me. I did buy some good gloves so I am blister free :)

Anyways, I rewarded myself this evening by watching two movies and about an hour ago when I decided it was time to turn in for the night, I looked out my back door and thought I saw something move out there. So I went over and turned on the porch light and what do I see? A possum. Just sitting there blinded by the light. A POSSUM!!! What was I to do? How was I to proceed? I had to get him off my porch so I pounded on the door in the hopes that I would startle him. Nope. He just sat there completely unfazed. I couldn't go out there. Those things are mean. So I opened the door a crack, stuck my nose out and yelled "Go away!" real quick and then slammed the door shut. He turned a fraction in my direction. Seriously! These things aren't afraid of anything! So I did it again and what does the stupid thing do? It crawls down the space where the tree comes out of the deck. So now I have a possum that lives under my deck. What on earth am I supposed to do now? The way I see it I have three options and I don't like any of them:

Option 1: Poison it. If I do this, it will eat the poison, go under the deck, die, and then stink, therefore making this not an option.

Option 2: Set a trap. If I do this, it will get caught in the trap and die...hopefully. If it doesn't die, it will crawl back under the deck and die of injuries. If it does die in the trap, then I have to dispose of it therefore making this not an option.

Option 3: Just let it be. If I do this, there will always be a possum under my deck and then it will have little possum babies that will always live under my deck too therefore making this not an option.

Why can't it live in someone else's yard? The people that live behind me have this huge shed and lots of junk in their yard that the possum can hide under. I'm sure there are lots of backyards with lots of dark hiding places. Why did it choose my yard? *shudder* What am I going to do?

Facebook...let's just be honest with each other

Okay Facebook. We need to have a little chat. What is up with the advertisements you are allowing on your sidebar? I am deeply concerned. Apparently there are a lot of issues and offers out there that I haven't been aware of. Here is a sampling:

"Need Help Wasting Time?"

Ooooh! Ooooh! I can answer that one! No. I do not need help wasting time...that is why I am on facebook.

"Get A Guy"

*ahem* Thank you. Thank you for this advertisement. I was really wondering how I would accomplish the monumental task of how to get a guy and then you went and offered me a guide. I like to see that you have my best interest at heart.

"Fixes Snoring"

...it just looks like an el-cheapo mouth gaurd to me. Although I'm not sure...is it a nose plug? No, looks like a mouth guard. Either way, I don't see how either one would fix snoring.

"Help Share Christ's Love"

I'm not sure where exactly this picture was taken or what exactly it is, but I do know this...it has nothing to do with Christ. It appears to be someone's vacation/stupid tourist photo. It looks like two babies that are bowing...????

"Roosters Country Bar"

...Do they look like roosters to you? I mean, I get the double meaning behind Hooters, but Roosters? I guess it's the whole double-o/big boobs thing...

"No Poisoning Prairie Dogs"

Apparently this is a huge problem with facebook users. I know it is tempting but I encourage you to refrain. Just don't do it people. We have to save the prairie dogs. What would we do without them? I shudder to think...