Tuesday, July 22, 2008

My Driving Vs. Your Driving

Since gas prices have risen to the obscene amount of $4 per gallon, some drivers out there feel the need to conserve what they put in their tank by taking a few precautions. They might go slower than normal (20 miles under the speed limit), they might turn off the air conditioner (which in TX in July is like signing your death certificate), or they might choose to not accelerate as fast after stopping. That is fine with me. That is wonderful. Good for you! I am impressed and awed that you have the patience and the discipline to do such things. I, however, do not for these reasons listed below:

1. I have spent too many years of my life sitting in traffic to actually go slower than I am allowed by the law on an open highway.
2. My car is black. With black interior. With these little round vents for air conditioning. And it is frickin' hot!
3. I would prefer to not sit through a green light.
4. I would prefer to not sit through two green lights.
5. It is worth the extra $5 a week I might pay in gas for not using these gas saving tips to get to sleep in an extra 5-10 minutes in the morning.

So, here is my advice to the conservative driver: Choose the Right! For instance, the gas pedal is...on the right. Your air conditioning knobs are...on the right (if its your car and you don't want to use the air conditioner, fine...but don't look at me like I'm a sinner if I turn mine on). And the right lane...is for people who want to drive slow. So for all of you righteous (ha, ha, get it?) people out there who want to conserve and save, please stay to your side of the road and let us careless, gas guzzling, money wasting sinners have the left side. Thankyouverymuch.

12 comments:

Alison said...

Oh, AMEN! I was just thinking this on the way home. I think I said, "Get out the way!!!" fifteen times. Arg!

WhiteEyebrows said...

I wish they would have just bought little cars instead of their monstrosities of trucks and suvs. Idiots. They deserve to be spending $200/tank.

Erika said...

Amen and Preach on!

Amy said...

Choose the right...you're hilarious! And you need not worry about me being in your way. I take care of business on the road!

The Patton Family said...

Amen to that!

You crack me up!

Tamara said...

For reals, right? If there's road in front of me, I'd like to use it! And no A/C? Isn't that akin to some form of primitive torture mechanism? I am afraid so.

So I decided to carpool. That way I can still figuratively hug trees while not feeling guilty if I speed like the maniac I am. Problem solve.

Tamara said...

er...solved. Not solve. my apologies.

Emily Anne said...

I am one of those peole everybody hates because I have chosen to drive slower. I do not drive under the speed limit, I just drive the actual speed limit. Believe it or not, this practice has helped my car get better milage. It has also helped me feel more serene behind the wheel.

I am not crazy enough to turn off my a/c however. I once had a car with a/c that barely worked so it was kept off most of the time, and I was living in Ft. Worth at the time, so I have no desire to sweat to death in my car if I don't have too. Plus, Mythbusters proved it doesn't get you better milage really anyway.

Matthew said...

Okay, now you're making me feel guilty. I drive 5-10 under the limit to and from work. I feel okay about it because I don't drive through rush hour. When I drive around a lot of people I'll at least go the limit, just out of respect. The same when I have passengers. Also, I choose the right. I think cops should spend less time on those going ten over and instead pull over slow people in the left lane and people who don't use turn signals.

Also, last year I traded in my 20 mpg Ford Escape for a 30 mpg Nissan Versa.

People that don't use their AC are silly. AC only uses about 1 more mile per gallon than not using it. A fair trade, I think. And people with their windows down create more drag on their car, wasting more gas than most ACs.

It's okay to drive fast. In the long run, driving slow won't save the environment or solve the fuel crisis. Only more fuel and better technology will do that. For me I'm just trying to save a few bucks driving to and from work. So yes, I will keep out of your way :)

(And if I actually had to get up early to get somewhere I'd be speeding too. There are some benefits to working nights. I am NOT a morning person.)

Kind of off subject, I dreamed of a yellow Miada convertible last night. It was cute, but I couldn't drive it because it was a stick.

Matthew said...

I think my auto spellcheck "fixed" the correct spelling of Miata. Oops

Amber said...

I whole heartedly agree. Let's face it...unless you drive for a living, those little gas savers add up to almost nothing - not worth the time, effort and headache wasted on them. And, at the very least, they should get out of the way!!!

K2 said...

You are totally preachin' to the choir! I love my AC too much to turn it off and I too am going to go the right speed. If you don't go about 10 miles over here in Hotlanta then you get run over.

That is all.